Day 15: Condon to Seeley Lake

Ride time: 2:17
Average: 11.5 mph
Distance: 26.57 mi

Finally, a reasonably priced breakfast!  We ate across the Hwy at Swan Valley Cafe and overheard some other local talking about waking up and finding a black bear in her backyard.  After our meal, we had some baking soda beverages to help dissipate the lactic acid in our sore leg muscles.  It tasted awful, but I have to say that I felt no burning in my quads on our ride today.  "Put me in Coach!  I've got fresh legs!"

Instead of following the route, we decided to book it down Hwy 83 to Seeley Lake--BAD IDEA.  There's little to no shoulder, and it's a very busy road.  We made KungPao noodles for lunch at Summit Lake, which was a scenic pull off for folks traveling on Hwy 83.  We were asked a million times by tourists where we were riding to.  I'm going to start making up stories about where we're going and where we've been.  Kind of like Mary does to strangers she rides the ski lifts with...

We rolled into Seeley Lake around 3 PM and set up camp at Big Larch campground.  It's very reasonably priced and has great big campsites (site #43 was a good pick for us).  We have a bounce box waiting here, but by the time we got to to post office, it was closed--they close at 4 PM. Hmmf.  We had to stop at a bank and get cash.  We're finding that not many campgrounds take credit card.

Peter and Lauren from California showed up and asked to share a campsite with us.  They're biking across the country to Maine.  We had a feast--grilled pork chops, portabello mushrooms, onions, red peppers, and a wild rice mix.  Plus, we had marshmallows, chocolate, and bananas for dessert!

Day 14: Bigfork to Condon

Ride time:  6:02

Average:  8.2 mph

Distance: 49.87 mi

Today was a near Double McCoy, considering we're only 8 miles from our next spot.  We awoke to a beautiful sunny morning in Bigfork.  We almost immediately began climbing out of the town and the scenery quickly changed to thick forests that smelled wonderful.  We were in the full sun throughout much of the day and it was HOT.  We sweat profusely while doing a near 6-mile climb.  The flies were quite irritating while we cranked out about 4 mph, which isn't fast enough to keep a breeze that would blow the bugs off.  Nate saw a black bear in a meadow, and then we both stumbled upon a black bear feeding on some vegetation near the road.  It was scared off very quickly, but of course, it took a toll on my nerves.

We finally pedaled into our camping spot, and as the book pointed out, it was swarming with mosquitoes.  So, I suggested that we book it to Condon, a town off of Hwy 83, about 10 miles down.  Here you go, Dan, a town and creek named after you:

We stopped at a grocery store on the way and slammed Gatorade to help replace all the fluid we lost on our ride--our 3-liter Camelbacks were drained.  We tailed a crazy thunderstorm much of the ride, but we we pretty lucky in that we were moving slower than the storm.  We came upon a patch of dense fog that came from a hail storm and the sight was pretty spectacular:

Hail-induced fog

I also ran over some ding-dong's "TO OUR CUSTOMERS" pin that gave me a nice flat about 1.5 miles from camp.  Thank you kindly for leaving your trash in the road.

Jerk.

I left the pin in it and rode carefully to Swan Valley Centre, a one-stop shop for just about everything.  It was just in time, too, because Mike, the mechanic, was just leaving for the night, but he let us into the showers, gave us a bathroom key, and told us where to camp.

Our humble abode

Day 13: Arnone's to Bigfork

Ride time: 2:31

Average: 10.6 mph

Distance: 27.09 mi

It was like leaving old friends this morning as we said goodbye to Tom and Pat.  Pat gave us a few pieces of venison sausage and some juice along with hot tea, and Tom walked us over the see the 8 foot around Larch tree in the lot across the road.  Our ride today zig zagged east and south, making our way toward Bigfork.  It was a quick ride, and flat to boot.  We then rode the dirt path along the Swan River, which is a Class 5 rapid.  Looking over the cliff to the river gave me the chills.

Overlooking the Swan River rapids

We came into town and found what we thought would be a good place to eat, Pocketstone Cafe, and it was horrible.  It apparently opened a month ago, and the food and service were horrible.  We then went to the post office to mail home some more stuff that we didn't need (water filter attachments, shoe inserts, extra patch kit for the sleeping pad, and some Velcro straps).  It's amazing what little gear we need to do this trip, and our bike weight gets lighter all the time!

One in a series of about seven pictures...

Our campsite was at Wayfarers State Park and we had a pretty neat site right down on the Flathead Lake.  The campground hosts were super friendly, cruising around on their golf cart.  In fact, all the campground hosts that we've met thus far have been extremely friendly to us bikers.  I think it's because once they hear that we biked from Banff and are headed to New Mexico, they perhaps feel some sort of pity for us or they think we're out of our minds and just want to keep us calm and happy...

Day 12: Whitefish to Arnone's

Ride time: 1:49

Average: 10.7 mph

Distance: 19.65 mi

Before we left this morning, I made eggs, potatoes, ham and cheese to get us geared up before our short ride.  We're supposed to go 40 miles today, but we opted instead to break it into two days, mostly because the lactic acid in our legs is still built up!  We also saw on the map that there was a "cyclist only lodging" about halfway to Swan Lake.

We did one last load of laundry and Nate went to the Safeway to shop for food before heading out of town.  Our ride was mostly flat, but had a seriously southerly head wind.  It made for beautiful weather, so no big deal.

We found our way to Tom and Pat Arnone's house on a beautiful piece of land.  They are an incredibly charming couple in their 70s, and they host bikers all season long.  They're fun to talk with and extremely hospitable.  We pitched a tent outside among the dozen or so hummingbirds that whizzed back and forth from the feeders to their nests.

Arnone's yard

Catch Up

Just to inform readers of how I'm creating posts for this blog... With whatever energy I have at the end of the night, I journal about the day's ride.  Then, when we get to a town that has Internet service, I furiously type up the posts.  Nate's in charge of picture posting, so I can't speed that up any faster (he's currently watching the US vs. Ghana game back at the hotel, so it could be awhile).

Also, if you'd like to post a comment on the blog and you don't have a sign-in, it will just say "anonymous" as the author.  In order to avoid that, sign your name at the bottom of your posting so that we know who it's from (unless, of course, you'd like to stay anonymous...).

Day 11: REST DAY!

Biker friendly business

Naked Fargos

Caught up on laundry, blogged at the Whitefish Public Library (which is a Great Divide Route friendly library), rested, cooked in the kitchenette at the motel, and biked around town.

Day 10: Tuchuck to Whitefish, MT

Ride time: 5:55

Average: 10 mph

Distance: 59.28 mi

Oh. My. God.  Let me start off by saying that I cried before going to bed tonight.  Not because I'm sad, but because my body hurts and I'm emotionally drained from the day's events.  The odometer hit 300 miles today.  It started out at 240.  We pulled a "Double McCoy"--we did two days in one, according to the book.  We were originally supposed to go from Tuchuck to Red Meadow Lake, but we decided to bypass Red Meadow and shoot for Whitefish.

We woke up to giant mosquitoes waiting patiently outside the tent for us, so this helped us break camp in record time.  We parted ways with Ed, the gentleman we met last week and have been riding with ever since.  I'm sure we'll run into him again.  Nate and I hauled down the mountain, thanks to the 29" tires, only to get slowed down on North Fork Road.  It was so ridiculously bumpy with rocks that I could only go about 8 mph.  We stopped for lunch, and then began our climb up red Meadow Road to the campground.  The lactic acid from yesterday's ride was making this a painful ascent.

About 5 miles from the top, we heard thunder to the north and the clouds thickened to an eerie purple.  It was definitely pouring on the pass we had just come down.  Suddenly, Nate turns around and says, "Honey!  A bear!"  I misunderstood him at first (like I usually do), and thought he was talking about someone behind us.  I was not going that fast up the road, so I quickly jump off the bike, fumble for my bear spray, and try to run ahead and look for the bear at the same time.  About 100 feet in front of us, there was an adolescent black bear, checking out something in the road.  Nate was taking pictures.  The bear didn't notice us at first because we were down wind from him, but then he saw us and wasn't frightened of us at all.  In fact, he took a few steps toward us.  We then starting yelling, waving our arms, and kicking up rock to scare it away.  He finally got the hint and took off into the woods.  We quickly walked our bikes past the spot where he ducked into the woods, then hopped on and pedaled furiously just as the bear reappeared behind us now, clearly interested in something in the road.  We got about 100 feet away before the downpour set in.  A bit too close for my comfort to dismount and don rain gear, but we did it anyway and got fully clothed.  My nerves were shot at this point, but I hopped back on the bike and kept pedaling.  The rain quickly stopped, but the clouds loomed.  We pressed on the pass, ran through some snow on the trail (Nate almost wiped out going through it), and then raced down the other side.  The bear sighting definitely sealed the deal on getting to Whitefish...

Ahhh!!!

After a quick, but painful 30 miles, we stopped at a BBQ place and split a full rack of ribs, coleslaw, beans, and a salad, which we promptly inhaled.

One of many eating frenzies

Day 9: Eureka to Tuchuck Campground

Ride time: 4:43

Average: 6.7 mph

Distance: 31.61 mi

After a huge breakfast at Jax Cafe again, we departed Eureka and began climbing.  We stocked up on groceries before we left at a pretty cool organic store in town.  You can see that our average speed was lowered significantly, pointing to the fact that much of the day's ride was uphill. 

We climbed like maniacs all day long, making me grateful for the fact the we had done Canada before getting to this day.  It's like Canada was the training for the beginning of the US section.  Whitefish Pass was pretty brutal, but stunning because of how remote we were.  Because we're in mega grizzly country (McCoy's book points out that this area is known for being the spot where wildlife officials relocate unruly grizzlies--kind of like a detention center, I guess), we cooked dinner about 4 miles before we hit our camp.  We were going a bit insane from the mosquitoes that wanted to eat us alive.

Eating dinner while the grizzlies watch us

Future GDR riders: hit up Montana Market before heading out, and the organic market is just south of there on the same side of the road.

Day 8: Baynes Lake to Eureka, MT

Ride time: 3:25

Average:  10.6 mph

Distance: 36.5 mi

We awoke to a very wet, dewy morning, but clear skies.  We biked out of the park and through the town of Baynes Lake.  We hopped onto Hwy 93 and had a whopping 8% grade down over the Elk River,  and of course, and equally vicious climb up the other side.  I actually enjoy those climbs, as long as they're not happening more than once a day.

We stopped at some podunk convenience store, whose owner had way too many signs posted (no garbage please, no dogs, hold handle down to flush, no loitering, etc.) for a snack before crossing.  We biked another 8 miles to the border at Roosville and had a vastly different crossing experience than we did a week ago--it took about 45 seconds for the 3 of us to cross.

Back to the U.S.A.

As we were heading into the town of Eureka, we met up with a bunch of other bikers doing the Northern Tier Route.  We got directions from a Eurekan on how to get to the post office and also gain access to the campground.  Nate and I had a bounce box waiting for us at the post office (a box that we shipped from Milwaukee to Eureka that had lots of resupply items in it: travel toothpaste, floss, Q-tips, vitamins, lotion, McCoy's book, spare tires, tools, etc.).  I was surprised at how excited I was to pick up the box of goodies, and I was also quite pleased with our nation's post office. :)  We also sent a 3 pound 6 ounce box of stuff home that we didn't need of books, clothes, and other things.

Next stop: finding the mysterious Eureka campground.  Turns out that we had to go to City Hall to pay $5 to camp, plus a $5 deposit for the key to the bathroom so that we could shower.  Upon our arrival, a farmer's market was being set up, so Nate and I bought some lemonade from 4-year old Hank, a gluten-free scone from a bakery, and Nate got a donut from an Amish family.  The photographer from the Tobacco Valley News was at the farmer's market and took our pictures, so be sure to check their site to see if we made it into their publication!

The day's events continue... we showered and then went to dinner at Jax Cafe in search of a good salad--veggies have been hard to come by on this trip.  Before we ordered, some old lady missed a step, fell, and smacked her head on the floor.  The ambulance came about 20 minutes later (must have been out on another call?).  We then stayed up quite late talking and laughing with Wes from California and Martin from Prague, Czech Republic, both of who were riding the Northern Tier.

Enjoying some laughs at Eureka City Park: Nate, Martin, and Wes

Future GDR riders: I would suggest laying over in Eureka, unlike the way that McCoy suggests in the book.  First of all, the town itself is pretty cool, and the camping experience in the town park is not to be missed.  Secondly, the ride to Tuchuck campground is difficult, and shaving off 10 miles (Roosville to Eureka) is quite helpful.

Day 7: Fernie to Baynes Lake, British Columbia

Ride time: 3:02

Average: 9.8 mph

Distance: 29.91

We left a cloudy and cold Fernie this morning and stopped at Mugshots cafe for a bit of breakfast before embarking on our ride.  I posted the last week's worth of blog entries without pictures.  We then were off on what was a fairly easy day.  It was certainly beautiful and warmed up quite nicely.  We arrived in Elko and stopped at the 3 and 93 Dairy Bar (Woah--they have a website!) for a yummy lunch and some ice cream.  I wanted to nap right after that, but alas, we had to press on to Kikoman Provincial Park.  The terrain here is vastly different from everywhere else that we've been thus far on the trip.  Tall Ponderosa pine trees, dry sandy, rocky soil--it's like the eastern side of the Rockies in Colorado.  Reminded me of Estes Park.

Fargos + Ponderosa pines = love

Looking out at Lake Koocanusa

Anyway, there was a flock of ospreys that were flying overhead after we got to the campground.  Our campsite is gorgeous--it over looks Lake Koocanusa, and there's nothing but sunshine.  Looking forward to crossing the border back into the States tomorrow--Canada's much more expensive than I thought it would be!

Day 6: Sparwood to Fernie

(I forgot to reset the cyclometer)

Ride time: ~3 hours

Average: ? mph (we hauled ass)

Distance: ~20 mi

It was a quick but chilly ride into Sparwood this morning, and much to our dismay, the library is closed on Mondays.  Lame.  We found a place to eat breakfast and decided to book it to Fernie, a short 20 mile ride.  It was actually a pleasant ride after I got a flat and took 40 minutes to repair it.  Ed and I patched the flat while Nate changed the tube.  At least it wasn't raining, eh?  I love Canadians.

Just as an aside, Hwy 3 from Sparwood to Fernie is a miserable road--it's a narrow shoulder, trucks hauling wicked smelling livestock OR giant trees are flying by and really could care less that there are bikers on the shoulder, and there's tons of debris, which is how I probably got a flat...

The three of us drafted off each other quite a bit on the ride since there was a significant head wind.  I felt a bit like the Tour de France riders.  It was about noon when we pulled into Fernie.  Nate and I are staying at the Powder Mountain Lodge for $59 a night.  They have laundry on the premises and Nate talked the guy into letting us bring the bikes into the room, stating that he'd clean them up first (and man, do they ever need cleaning--the mud is everywhere).

Cleaning up the bikes

Day 5: Blue Lake to stealth camp outside of Sparwood

Ride time: 2:55

Average: 10.7 mph

Distance: 31.43 mi

We bums (we're still traveling with Ed) slept in until 9:30 this morning.  After a power ride to Elkford, we had a delicious lunch at Emi's Cafe (just in time, too--they had to close shortly after we got there because the afternoon cook was sick and couldn't come in).  We did not follow the map today because we took Hwy 43 from Elkford to Sparwood to save time.  This was the first day that we didn't have any rain!!  Woohoo!

Our tent was the only thing that blended into the forest.

We stealth camped in some wildlife preserve that is on the same road as the donkeys and ranchettes just outside of Sparwood.  Tomorrow, we'll bike a short distance and check into some sort of lodging in Sparwood and take a rest day.

Day 4: Boulton Creek to Blue Lake BC Forest Service

Ride time: 4:37

Average: 7.9 mph

Distance: 36.64 mi

We had our first divide crossing today!  Elk Pass:

Divide crossing #1

I also fell twice today (which I do on a more-than-average basis), but I'm okay.  Just some bruising and cuts on my leg where I caught the cogs on the front derailleur.  The ride was super fun and almost rain free.  It started to rain after we ate lunch--actually it started to pour and got super cold.  Then, to add insult to injury, my front derailleur had an issue that Nate took care of in the pouring rain.  I almost lost it, but then the sun came out and slowly warmed us back up.

Wildlife update: we saw two moose, bear poop, bear tracks, and wolf tracks on our ride today!

Day 3: Mt. Engadine Lodge to Boulton Creek

Ride time: 2:31

Average: 8.9 mph

Distance: 22.6 mi

Turns out that Ed, the other Great Divide Route biker from California, headed out with us today.  He's in his mid-50s and is a very seasoned outdoorsman.  This is good; it lessens my bear anxiety (of which I haven't seen any yet, and that's okay).  We woke up to overcast skies and no rain, but of course, 2 miles into our ride, it starts to pour.  The bright side: it wasn't nearly as cold or incessant as it has been for the past 2 days.

Right after we donned our rain gear, a coyote comes down the middle of the road.  Nate instructs me to get out the pepper spray and says something about someone recently dying from a coyote attack, but I just checked Google news, and can't find evidence of any such attacks.  Regardless, I got it out and was prepared for a wild coyote attack.  It ran down the other side of the road and probably killed a prairie dog.

A killer coyote!

We rode well as a group of three and had a lot of fun.  We ran into two Belgian bikers that started in Anchorage, AK and had biked down the Pacific coast and were going to end in Calgary in the next few days.

We ended up at Peter Lougheed Provincal Park and camped at Boulton Creek.  

Day 2: Spray Lakes to Mount Engadine Lodge

Ride time: 1:40
Average: 8.1 mph
Distance: 13.7 mi

Guess what?  We awoke to more rain.  In fact, it didn't stop raining all friggin' night long.  I'm not exaggerating.  I woke up with a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach due to the fact that it was barely above freezing and everything was soaked.  My fingers and toes were numb.  What a horrible way to start out our Great Divide Route trip.  And of course, today is my 31st birthday, and this is NOT how MY birthday is supposed to turn out...(watch Robyn's will run rampant)

We slowly packed up our super saturated camp, mostly because my fingers were not working that well.  We decided to bike east around Spray Lake instead of following the map, which was a great decision.  We saw Mount Engadine Lodge on the map, and agreed that we were going to stop there and warm up and get a room, if they had one.  We were in the middle of nowhere and this was the only service around for at least 50 miles (provided that we didn't bike back to Canmore, which would be really lame).

We ride into the lodge, and Chris, one of the innkeepers asks, "What can I do for you guys?"  All we could muster out was, "Warm food and a room."  Turns out, today was their opening day for the summer season and all they had left were two rooms.  We promptly set our bikes against the side of the lodge, walked inside and shed our rain gear, and got some delicious hot tea.  By the way, the tea they served is a local company in British Columbia called TeaLeaves and it's the best tea ever.  And I'm not saying that because we were cold; it's really delicious.

The lodge we stumbled upon was spectacular:

Departure from Engadine.  It's not raining...yet.

We saw at least 3 moose in the meadow behind the lodge, traipsing through the mud and soaking in the rain.
We ate super well and had great conversation.  In fact, we met another wet biker that is doing the Great Divide Route solo--he checked in yesterday.

Necessary gratitude list:
1. Dry sacks for the sleeping bags
2. Gore Bike Wear
3. Merino Smartwool
4. Lodges in the middle of nowhere

Day 1: Canmore to Spray Lake Reservoir Campground

Ride time: 2:05
Average: 6.6 mph
Distance: 13.86 mi
RAIN, RAIN, and more RAIN.  Oh my God.  After stopping at Rebound Cycle in Canmore to get Nate some gloves that would bode well in the rain, the guy who worked there was geeked at the fact that we were sporting Gore Bike Wear and took a picture of us as we headed out.  It's posted on their website.  We then left Canmore with butterflies in my stomach, and headed up White Man's Pass.  It was an immediate and brutal climb in buckets of rain.  And, the temperature was hovering just above 0 degrees Celsius (we're in Canada, eh?).  To make a long ride story short, this day sucked.  It sucked worse than the entire last school year... okay, I'm kidding about that, but this was horrible.

This is how crappy it was:

Spray Lake Reservoir

We got to Spray Lakes and set up camp with numb fingers.  It was really difficult to get warm and there was no shelter other than the surprisingly decent outhouses.  So, we cooked and ate in there.

The multi-purpose room

Nate made cheesy mashed potatoes, tuna (in the pouch), and red peppers with the alcohol stove.  We ate well--just not in the greatest location.

Canmore, Alberta

Today we wrapped up loose ends before our departure tomorrow.  Nate and I decided that since we were staying in Canmore, the town just southeast of Banff, that we'd depart from there instead of trekking up the 10 or so miles and then coming back down.  We justified this decision by driving up to Banff with Peter late Tuesday morning and hiking up Tunnel Mountain and stretching out our legs after being in the car since Saturday morning..  It offered beautiful views of the town and the surrounding mountains.

Top of Tunnel Mountain in Banff

A bit of foreshadowing...we did this hike miraculously in between rain storms.  When we got here yesterday, it was pouring.  It poured all day today, and it just might continue to pour.  'Tis the rainy season in this part of Canada...

Milwaukee to Banff

We finally set off from Milwaukee on Saturday morning, June 12.  We stopped in St. Paul, Minnesota to have lunch with my mother, Alyce.  Then we rocked on towards Fargo, ND to pay homage to the town that our bikes are named after.  We camped at some lame KOA, got up and had a solid breakfast at Perkins in Fargo.  Here's the parting shot of Peter with the bikes loaded up on the Prius:

This picture below represents the Canadian border patrol at Portage, ND.  We were held up there for at least 45 minutes while they questioned us, interviewed Peter, and then finally searched the car.  The question: Are you carrying any firearms, weapons, pepper spray or bear spray? was answered in the affirmative by us because, of course, we were carrying pepper spray.  Then they asked what we were doing and where we were staying.  They didn't so much like the fact that Peter was dropping us off and we were biking back, nor did they like that we didn't have a hotel reservation in Canmore.  So, they brought us in, questioned us and then searched the car...and found nothing but the bear spray...

Sunday night 6/13, we camped at Cypress Hill Provincial Park in Saskatchewan, just outside of Maple Creek, a tiny town that reminded us of the shoot out scene in No Country for Old Men.  That's me in our tent--nothing better than a clear night sleeping with the rain fly off.

Peter had talked up poutine nearly the whole way from Milwaukee to the Canadian border.  Stopped for breakfast at a cafe in Maple Creek and there, on the menu, was poutine.  That's all Peter had for breakfast.

I 

T Minus Whenever It Feels Right

We leave for the Divide this Saturday this is what I think I will have in the frame bag on the large Fargo and gas tank. 
On the right is the gear for the gas tank. Alien2, Griptillian, tripod, camera in an Aloksak, a trapezoid of bubble packaging for extra padding.
The top pocket of the frame bag is much bigger than it seems. It has the tent poles for an Emerald Forest SL3, road morph pump, headlamp, Ay-Up light charger, camera charger, camera cable, small sketch book, and The Count of Monte Cristo.
The lower pocket has the cook system, an insulator that I just made, a PCT bear hanging setup, padlock and cable, and two more fuel bottles.

Transportation Change

It turns out that you cannot rent a car in the United States and do a one-way drop off in Canada.  I became painfully aware of this Saturday afternoon as I was trying to arrange our transportation from Milwaukee to Banff.  This is ridiculous.  Nate and I spent a few hours trying to figure out alternatives to getting to Banff (we looked into riding the train, and I even went so far as to look at craigslist to buy a beater SUV and then we'd ditch it or try to sell it in Canada), and the best we could come up with was a one way rental of some crappy mid-sized sedan with Hertz to Calgary for over $1,000.  LAME.

We let the problem sit and went out last night to forget about the snafu.  We went out with some friends and one of them started asking Nate and I about the bike trip.
Peter: "So I hear your headed on a big bike trip really soon?  When are you leaving?"
Me: "Well...um...we're hoping to leave Saturday morning, but as of right now, we can't secure a rental car."  I explained the problem concerning international car rental rules and regulations.  On a whim, I said, "Wanna take a road trip out there with us?"
Peter: "Serious??!?  Like Banff, Canada??  I wrote a paper about that place my sophomore year in high school, and I've always wanted to go!  I even have a Prius!"
I can't believe this conversation is really happening, and it turns out that he's a teacher as well and has the summer off, so he's able to give us a ride out there and see Banff at the same time.

As of right now, we're still on schedule to leave MKE Saturday morning, but now we have 3 drivers, some company, and a great this-world-is-way-bigger-than-me story to tell.

New Do

I got at least ten inches of my hair hacked off yesterday in order to deem it "wilderness ready."  In my opinion, dealing with short hair for several days without washing it is way easier (and prettier) than having long hair.  I'll be sending in my two 10" ponytails to Locks of Love to help disadvantaged children receive hair pieces.  It's taking some getting-used-to.

Nate's hair is almost 10" long, too.  When's your appointment, Dear?